Perspective on Fathers’ Day

I have not figured out how yet, but one of these days I would like to be a clean, stand up comedian on the side. Honestly, as a kid who grew up extremely shy and never wanted anyone to recognize me, it is quite a thing to consider. It may never happen, but maybe . . .

While I may never do a stand-up routine, I am already a child of God, a husband, a dad, a pastor, a college professor, a coach to other pastors, a friend, and a few other things. Those are my roles in life. When I think about who I am - those roles come to the forefront of my mind.

One of my favorite roles in life is and has always been Dad. My wife and I have 3 kids. We lost our first child prior to its birth. That was hard. I had already been dreaming about playing catch, teaching him/ her, and sharing all the moments that a parent normally has with a child. However, that was not God’s plan.

I now have two adult children who are adulting well. Honestly, both of my kids are better people than I am today, which means they are much, much, much better people as young adults than I was. They are kind, generous, patient, loving, intelligent, Jesus followers. As the Bible says, “Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from him.” (Psalms 127) I have definitely received a reward and gift way beyond what I deserve.

Father’s Day is coming up. I don’t know why, but it always seems to be a second-class day when compared to Mother’s Day, St. Patrick’s Day, or Labor Day. Why is that?

As I have watched T.V. over the years I have noticed a trend in television fathers. Think about it - we used to have dads like those on Father Knows Best, My Three Sons, and Andy Griffith. Then we begin to see a slight shift to Archie in All in the Family and Mike on The Brady Brunch. Next, we see Dr. Huxtable in The Cosby Show, Mr. Keaton on Family Ties, and Mr. Tanner in a Full House. None of these dads were perfect, but they were all engaged in their kids’ lives and were seen as an integral part of their kids’ development.

As we move forward, the perception of men and fatherhood begins to change. I mean, we get Tim Taylor in Home Improvement, Homer Simpson (D’oh!) of The Simpsons, Dan Conner of Roseanne, Ray from Everybody Loves Raymond, to Married with Children and Modern Family. What do we see?

We see men who are dumb, useless, unable to contribute anything but a paycheck - and definitely have no wisdom that supersedes the mom’s - or anyone else’s for that matter. The message “Dad’s are dumb, useless, and barriers.”

But, what about the dads who coach their kids’ sports teams, work extra jobs to pay for school clothes, who drive their kids all over Texas for football, baseball, softball, volleyball, showing animals, band concerts, or one-act plays? What about the dad who cooks, cleans, mows, does laundry, and other stuff to make the house run? What about the dad who reads to his kids, helps with homework, takes kids to and from school, and goes on field trips? What about the dad that has the hard, but loving conversations with their kids because they want their kids to launch into adulthood with as little pain, shame, and retreat as possible. But more importantly, as adults who have enough fuel in their tank to reach for the moon, stars, or whatever dream they have their own lives. What about those dads?

What about the dads who believe that your character, your faith, and your family are the most valuable things you will ever have. What about those dads? That reminds me of what Ephesians 6:4 says, “Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger by the way you treat them. Rather, bring them up with the discipline & instruction that comes from the Lord.”

Hey dad. Happy Father’s Day. Your kids and your community need you now, more than ever.

Here’s a corny dad joke for you . . . I ordered a chicken and an egg online . . . I will let you know which one comes first.