Rude or Forgetful?

That Little Voice

When is forgetfulness construed as rudeness or vice versa?

When I fail to send a thank you note in a timely period even though I had thought about it several times during the past six days, is that rudeness or forgetfulness or procrastination?

I would prefer not to think of it as rudeness. And since I am 81, commonly called aged, I could get by with forgetting to sit down and write such a note, or maybe it is dementia. But with dementia, does one suddenly remember something like being gracious?

I am finding it is easier to blame everything on how long I have been of age. It is such a convenient excuse, and most often folks nod their understanding and even their agreement to the oversight.

It could be they too are afflicted with laziness or a lack of interest to send a note of gratitude for an act of generosity or kindness, no matter how large or small.

Writing is so much simpler these days. No special paper or pen are needed, no envelope, no stamp, no post office, no mail deliverer. Just a phone or computer, an email account, the ability to type, and 60 seconds to whip off a note saying ‘dinner was great’, ‘your gift of soaked raisins will find a perfect place on my refrigerator shelf’, or ‘thanks for the two hours of hearing about your digestive issues.’

I’m not a person who remembers birthdays or dates of significance to others. I do attempt to send greetings at Christmas and I have been known to send an early birthday message in each year-end dispatch. Something like, “I know the coming year will be a wonderful experience for you, so have a great time at your birthday celebration…if you make it.”

In my mind that gets me off the hook for my unsent Happy Birthday card.

I still question if I am being rude, forgetful, or showing a deep sense of lack of interest when I fail to say or send a simple ‘thank you’ for a delightful dinner. But hopefully, the person not receiving my late thank you message will have forgotten they had even hosted me.