that little voice

I have a mental block about birth dates. Truth is I have mental blocks about a lot of things, but I’ll only share my deficiency in remembering the specific day when someone is born.

I’m big on celebrating my birthday, so it puzzles me why I don’t mark my calendar to remind me when those I love will begin a new year of living. Unless I get some sort of message via social media I am totally oblivious to this annual observance. A month or two may pass when I suddenly remember someone’s birthday was months ago, and I either shamefully send a ‘belated’ wish for another 10 months of blissful existence, or more shamefully act like I sent a birthday wish and they didn’t receive it.

Would I do that? It has been known to happen, but I’ll not admit I was the one who perpetuated that lie.

But, back to the why of my lack of action surrounding birthdays.

I haven’t always been lax in my ability to recall these important dates. As one of three siblings growing up, it was impossible to forget these important dates. Everyone in our household made a big deal out of birthdays, making certain no one forgot presents were expected on our ‘big’ day. Even a pack of gum from one of my sisters was appreciated, or at least demanded.

And, of course, my friend’s birthdays were easily remembered because their mothers made certain all the neighbor kids were invited for ice cream, cake and Pin the Tail on the Donkey games.

Now it is hard work to shake my memory bank in order to register those special days. I’m finding ‘hard work’ is not what I’m good at any more. Maybe I never was a hardworking expert, but I know I have lost interest in long hours, intense concentration, and back breaking labor. I’m not certain why I think remembering birthdays requires long hours or laborious effort, but, as a friend of mine often said, “When you are looking for an excuse, any will do.”