that little voice

Unseen personalities emerge in isolation. Will those traits remain after we reenter the world of hugs and co-mingling, she wonders?

How long will I be hesitant to have a drink with friends, visit someone’s home, share a face to face encounter?

I’ve been surprised by the reactions of some friends as they adjust (or is it maladjust?) to the social restrictions to COVID-19.

Some folks lock themselves in their homes, avoiding any physical contact, ordering food to be delivered, waving to them through their secure windows or doors, determined to not breathe another’s possible contaminants. N-95 masks seldom needed since they are sequestered and sealed off.

Others are wary but demand some interaction with neighbors and friends not limited to Zoom meetings. They share a drink on open air patios, or picnic under trees in parks. They may even take walks with a friend, carefully maintaining a safe distance and donning those lifesaving masks.

I encounter those who walk the streets, eat in restaurants sans face coverings and seem unconcerned about this disease that has killed more than 200,000 people in the United States alone.

What makes people react in these different ways, I wonder, when all are presented with the same set of facts? I fall somewhere in the middle of these patterns. I do not go out without covering my nose and mouth with a WHO recommended mask. I walk my dogs for an hour each day, glad to be out in the fresh air. I even trek to the local tienda down the street for minor things such as milk or eggs, and open my door to very few people unless they are bringing food.

Meanwhile I talk with friends on the phone, through emails or on Zoom meetings, and after six months I seem to be faring well, especially since before COVID I was called an extrovert.

I have down days, but I had those before the virus began its rampage, maybe not as many, but still ‘the blues’ would creep into my days unsolicited.

Those folks who seem to throw caution to the wind are either braver than my soul or they believe they have impenetrable immune systems that will keep them healthy and their lungs operating without stress.

I’m not eager to test the odds of beating the nasty virus if it decides my body is a good place to reside. I’m nervous to be near anyone who isn’t also a bit reluctant to trust the airways aren’t spraying invisible droplets of virus from someone walking around with COVID.

I would like to think this too shall pass and soon, but I may be in for a long hitch with masks hanging around my face. So, to answer my question how long before I either adjust to a new normal of hiding out or the virus has run its course and I can return to neighborly get-togethers and eating at an indoor restaurant:

I have no idea what that time period will be, but tomorrow would be good.