that little voice

I’ve been thinking about what I’ve introduced to the world, or even to myself, lately.

What new thought? What new idea?

What new person have I met? What new emotion have I felt? What new action have I taken?

Frankly, living in my cocoon of isolation I’ve become lazy: mentally and physically.

Tucked in the recesses of my mind I have believed ‘this too shall pass’ and soon, while in reality the COVID-19 virus will probably be influencing our lives for many more months if not years.

Which means, I need not look at this as a vacation but rather as the norm. And that is going to require I resume exercising and creating in new ways.

I would like to do my water exercises, but that’s not possible since I don’t have a pool, public pools may not be safe, and my bathtub is more the size of a foot bath than a full body experience. More walking is beneficial, if I stay away from other people and their dangerous spewing of bacteria while just breathing.

I could exercise my mind by reading new books rather than spending hours watching and listening to pundits explaining in detail the wreckage this disease is causing throughout the world.

And I could sign up for more Zoom meetings. Four or five a week may not be enough to keep my mind active and my emotions on an even keel.

I could learn to sew masks but getting a button back on a shirt is more of a challenge than fixing a meal, which is way above my pay grade.

Oh, the excuses I create for remaining idle. I seem to be drifting, not accomplishing, just stewing in my own juices of inactivity, and feeling guilty for not saving the world, or at least attempting to leap those imaginary tall buildings.

Boredom conjures up visions of greatness. But reality exposes my lack of introducing anything worthwhile.

I think I will blame this laziness on COVID-19, I can’t handle any more shame.